No Tv In Living Room
Why There's No TV In Our Family Room
I was recently asked if all nine of us sit down and watch a lot of movies together as a family. The honest answer is that not once in the seven months we have lived in the house have all nine of us watched so much as a commercial together.
Part of the reason is that we all have such distin c t tastes in entertainment that its difficult for people who mostly watch British murder mysteries (Mike and Hope) to find common ground with those who watch mostly Vin Diesel movies (Beth and Luc), soapy dramas (Sarah), superhero cartoons (the kids) or sports (me).
The other reason for this is that we've made a choice to not make TV watching a central part of our life together as a family. While all of us probably watch at least an hour of TV a day, we also felt that if we were going to live together in community, that meant actually spending time together and interacting with each other, not just staring at a screen together.
That meant that when we were setting up the house, we organized our spaces in such a way that digital distractions are located at the "edges" of our house and the centre of our home is filled with things that tend to reward creativity, skill and active engagement.
So on the main level of our house there is no TV, no computer, nothing.
In fact, there's very little technology in the main spaces of our house at all. Besides lamps and household appliances (fridges, freezers, dishwashers, microwave etc), the only pieces of technology on the main level of our house are a small Bose speaker for playing music, an electric piano for making music and a wireless router to distribute the sweet, sweet wifi to all corners of the house.
The result is that when people spend time in the common areas of the house, they do things like play a song on the piano or simply relax in front of the fireplace, in the absence of a TV, serves as the focal point of our family room.
Other times people can receive creative inspiration by looking at the wall full of original prints hand drawn by my grandfather before pulling out some pencil crayons and setting to work on colouring their own masterpieces alongside Michael at the kitchen table.
Most Saturdays you'll find the kids helping Michael bake cookies and cakes in the kitchen or curled up on the couch next to Hope listening to stories. Bethany cross-stitches, Eric reads and Sarah putters around the house, straightening things up and adjusting the decor as necessary.
When we all want to do something together, we pull out a couple deck of cards, gather around the kitchen table and play our traditional Versluis family game; Aggravation (think Phase 10 but with only seven rounds).
All of this is based on our belief that "real play" and interaction is necessary for the healthy development of kids AND adults. Instead of just being "consumers" of entertainment, we want to be people who creatively contribute to the world. While these are values that we've held for a long time, lately the writings of Andy Crouch have challenged us to continue to ensure that we prioritize values like relationships over the easy comforts of technology. If you're intrigued, we'd suggest checking out his books The Tech-Wise Family and Culture Making.
We've even applied these principals to the way we prepare and eat food. Instead of stocking our cupboards full of "microwaveable" things that are designed to be consumed without any creativity or cultivation, we try to choose options that require a bit more skill and interaction.
So almost everyone in our house loves pizza, which means that every Friday night is pizza night. But instead of ordering in pizza or cooking frozen pizza, we buy those packs of Naan bread, chop up some veggies, grate some cheese and pull out a pack of pepperoni and do "make your own pizza" night. Everyone gathers around the kitchen island, picking their toppings and creating their own gourmet masterpiece. In that way, Pizza Friday is shifted from an act of mere consumption, to something that promotes creativity and connection.
Now, don't get me wrong; we aren't amazing, super-superior, hipster-tech-snobs. Nothing about the layout of our house stops us from bringing our phones, tablets and laptops into the kitchen or living room and vegging out, which we do all the time. Also, moving the TV's out of the living room has also resulted in a TV now sitting in the bedroom of every adult in the house, which studies show is also a terrible idea! (As Lucas looks over my shoulder when I'm writing, he says to let you know that he'll write a future blog about how he and Beth have 10 screens total in their media room and bedroom. As I said, we're not exactly Amish around here).
And just cause we give pride of place to items that promote real play in our kids, it does't mean that our kids never get bored.
But what I've come to discover is that when our kids get the most bored is also when they get the most creative. This past Saturday morning Tristan and Alexa spent over three hours turning wrapping paper tubes, elastics and straws into fully functional bow and arrows. A few weeks before that they turned some cardboard boxes into a fully functional fort, complete with it's own "Justice" store.
Tonight they amused themselves in the craft room drawing pictures of Darth Vader and BB-8. Some of the best moments we've had as a family in our house have come when we've all shut our devices off, gathered in the common spaces and spent time cooking, crafting, conversing and playing together.
With more and more studies showing the negative impact of digital media on our attention spans, sleep patterns, intelligence and happiness, perhaps a little boredom is good for us.
PS. This past weekend I shared a talk at Parkway Church that expanded on these ideas of moving away from digital consumption and towards tangible creation and connection. You can check it out HERE if your interested in thinking about this more.
Source: https://medium.com/@ourbighouse/why-theres-no-tv-in-our-family-room-fd23ad31ec73
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